Freesound Forums

...and I wanted to tell you guys a little about my musical journey since then as well as provide a link to my youtube channel where I'm uploading new tracks and music videos.

Where to begin:
So, when I started producing back in 2013 it was like a dream come true. I would often just sit there as time flew by until the early morning hours and experiment with different sounds. Commercially my music was absolutely worthless but to me it meant everything.
I would often listen to a new track with my eyes closed, dwelling inside a microscopic universe of pure sound and rhythm.
I was always quite disappointed, even surprised and quite in shock, when I would show my friends what I had achieved and they would just laugh and shake their head at me. To be fair, my music sounded kinda... funny back then. I just couldn't hear it.

It was this weird mix of a kick so overpowered it would break any headphone on sight paired with a melodic progressive bass, a snare and another melodic element (like a trumpet) that would swap into something else towards the middle of the track.
Music that you could probably get famous with in 2020 if you would just push it hard enough. I mean hey, it made people laugh and bang their heads to the unforgiving kick drum and wicked, unfitting melodies. But of course I wanted to progress.

In 2016 I eventually had reached commercial acceptance. I released my first 'Tales of Wisdom EP' on a label which was a huge step forward for me.
This personal success had me crazy about releasing more and more and I solely focused on finishing EP after EP. Track after track after track. All gas no brakes. It went on until I forgot what I was even producing music for anymore. I had taken on a sort of assembly line mindset for creating something I loved.

Instead of producing for myself I was producing what I thought others would like to hear. I heard of fellow colleagues getting chart placements in Beatport's Top 100 and that sounded like music in my ears more than anything.
I eventually got it. But the joy was short-lived.
As with all materialistic delights you find yourself craving more, more, more. Without appreciating the moment. Or how far you've come. Or that a Beatport 100 chart placement means jacksh*t to your subconscious mind.

Eventually I hit a block. I managed to squeeze out a few more half assed EPs before it got to the point where I struggled to finish even another track.
My secret dream that other producers would reach out to me, praising my sound and wanting to play my tracks at their next set never became a reality. The isolation and absence of feedback was demoralizing.
Yes, I had the label, and yes, a few people would buy and stream my music but you see, once that becomes the new normal you find yourself kinda stuck in a loop.

You find yourself thinking. If I'm such a talented producer, then why isn't the universe showing me a glimpse of hope that this could be my job one day?
You see, I've always been the guy who sat there, did his thing and then hoped for the best. I never really did much to achieve the best though. I never once asked myself. What is a realistic opportunity that could come out of all this? Where could music production realistically take me and how could I get there?

I stopped. After countless nights without sleep, unhealthy snacks, smokes and parties I thought about something that I had never previously thought about. What if Techno had been just a phase for me? What if it was time to move on?

I missed creating melodic soundscapes that were floating around in my head. And I missed doing whatever I wanted and not creating art for the sole purpose of it being accepted by other people.
I missed releasing tracks for my Soundcloud whenever I felt like it instead of waiting on a release date for months just to catapult my life's work straight into Beatport's eternal void.

It took me forever to start again. But eventually I did it. I found myself somewhere in a trap influenced environment with my own vocals and a unique touch.
But most importantly I had found what I had lost somewhere in the creative process once again. My musical freedom. Being able to listen to my music with a smile on my face because it makes me happy.
I've learned that writing lyrics and singing them in is hard work and takes time and practice. I'm having fun improving my techniques with every new track and learning new things along the way.

More than anything I can finally realize my dream of uniting what's good and being able to make my own videos. The camera's been there long enough. I just never knew how to use it.
Now this new project is still pretty young and I'm still a bit anxious about how people might perceive it. Never underestimate that you're putting yourself out there, vulnerable to the opinion of the many. Not that it matters. But the vulnerability is still there whenever trying something new.
And as I'm looking to improve and find myself a little more with every new little thing I put out there, it is always of so much help to get a little feedback if not appreciation along the way.

I hope this story inspires you to keep doing what you're doing. Even if it's hard sometimes. Or. Well. Most the time.
But no matter what happens from here, I found what I was looking for. The freedom to do what makes me happy.
Am I looking for commercial success? Absolutely. I love doing this. Showing myself on camera. Wearing clothes. Cutting. Editing. Mixing. Mastering. Promoting. I want my stuff to be seen. Especially as I feel it getting better with every step.
This time it's all coming from the right place. Inside.

Hope you like it. But if not, hope you could take something with you from my story. Dunno, just felt like sharing this.

My Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPz71HH8LtZfGqzh7SolT1w

I read your post and clicked your channel. Your channel is not music based. I thought it would be your music

you're right, it did take a turn I regretted on my channel. Every video is deleted now and only music left. If you want to take a second look.